This year, my 90th year, I have been asked to do it with modern technology and post it on my blog.
So here it is:
2018 Memories
We continued living in Kapitolyo Pasig, not far from EDSA which for us is about the geographical center of Metro Manila, Philippines.
The most important element of the whole arrangement is the “we.”
For 19 years (and will be 20 on March 8, 2019) I have been blessed with a relationship that has given me awesome life and stimulation “wholistically.” (I use the “w” to emphasize that it pertains to the whole of life.)
That is, it has given me all-around meaning and support in all aspects of my life. And at my age that means also having a very caring caregiver.
Being near the center of the city has been advantageous in regards to travel for work for both of us. My partner travels all directions to his work as yoga and group exercise teacher. Being centrally located makes me accessible for working with people looking for help in wellness endeavors.
In 2013 Argel Tuason and I set up The Well wellness program for those seeking help with HIV and other serious life difficulties, and we developed The Well wholistic method for managing them. Again this year, that work gave me satisfaction, no charge, no fee, it’s all free. Just contact 0920 903 4909.
Since I arrived in this country in 1991, I have assisted people in non-traditional relationships who would like to affirm their vows in a commitment ceremony. I have continued that joyful work for 27 years. Towards the end of 2018, I began referring couples to my successor Bishop Regen Luna. Recently I made such a referral, and they replied, “I attended a wedding you officiated 10 years ago, and you have been my idol ever since, and I have dreamed of you to conduct my wedding.” Of course, I could only say, “Ok, bless you; I’m happy to be with you for this occasion which is so meaningful for you.”
For several years we enjoyed sharing our life with Joy who came to us when she was a very little puppy. She was with us when groups were coming to the house several nights a week for prayer or support groups. But as all doggies, she only had a doggie life span.
Now in an apartment in the city, we don’t think it’s fair to a barking four-footed furry friend to be so confined. So when Matilda, a street cat, kept asking for food, we adopted her. Then she brought forth kitties. Esmeralda (Esma) stayed and had Alaska and more, and Alaska stayed. Then Esma had more kitties, and Trixie and Bob stayed and brought diversity. Trixie is a boy and Bob is a transgender girl, always sighing and purring for an audition with Ru Paul. Now mama Esma and Alaska and Trixie and Bob eat and come and go day and night. They know we love ’em, and they love our feeding bowls, and sometimes it seems they look up to us with love in their eyes. Our friend who feeds many dogs at his farm home thinks we are not good at budgeting. He doesn’t know we are harboring a family of house cats.
Well, it’s been a full 12-month year. I try to keep up with my family in Michigan and Ohio and more elsewhere. When my partner goes to work in gyms around the metropolis, if I don’t have an appointment for The Well or other counseling, I ride the Grab (I’ve never had a car here) along with him and work on the computer in the nearest Starbucks.
I always pray for my awesome sons and daughters in Michigan (and elsewhere). Sorry that I was not a better father when they were young. Their mother said my work was always a priority.
In addition I’m happy that I’m getting to know more and more of my second cousins in and around the beloved town of my birth in the hills of Ohio, Danville. And I am very blessed to be in touch with many of my wonderful nieces and nephews. Sad that one of my (younger) brothers, Jim (me being the oldest of ten), died this year. Some of his grandchildren are in touch with me.
When my beautiful and wonderful daughter told me she was on a vacation trip to Italy this year, I was thrilled for her and feebly replied that when I was a teacher, I won a scholarship for summer study in Rome… When my enterprising entrepreneur son told me he has his own thriving catering business, I was thrilled for him and feebly replied that before he was born his mother and I had a catering business before we bought our two restaurants… When my talented thespian son told me he was playing a lead part in a neighborhood theater group production, I could only say I wish I could be there, but I remember well that I had seen him perform in that theater years ago, and he was following in the footsteps of his thespian mother. You can’t imagine the pride I feel in another daughter telling me about the work she and her husband do for the Lord.
When I first came here, I read and studied everything I could about Jose Rizal, the national martyr-hero. As I write today I am thrilled that all the daily newspapers are carrying editorials, historical reminders and opinion features about “my historical idol,” who was martyred 122 years ago for writing so eloquently about independence. 19 years ago I wrote a historical novel to commemorate his life. I have always said if all would follow the principles of Rizal, all would be heroes.
I received and sent thousands of emails, hundreds of Facebook and text messages, and a minimum of Instagram and Twitter. I’ve been blessed to receive the wisdom and inspiration of my long long-time friend Brian McNaught throughout the year. I am thankful for my listing in the LGBT-Ran Archives, which made it possible for more people to make contact for help.
So it’s been a year of routine busy-ness. In between times, finishing a new book and my autobiographical memoirs — to be reported in next year’s letter.
When I am thankful for the privilege and blessing of praying the holy Mass every day, I think of my Grandma Mickley walking to Mass and Holy Communion everyday with her mother (90+ when I knew her) through rain or shine or snow, and how that inspired me to be eager for my first Holy Communion at 6 and then be thrilled to be so close to the altar when I began to serve Mass at age 10 and enter seminary at 13 and have daily Mass.
And one son requested that I include here a prayer:
“Lord, thank you. Thank you for 90 years, 9 offspring, innumerable grandchildren, nieces and nephews, cousins, 4 cats, and 100’s of friends and 1 incomparable partner, and an opportunity to serve you by serving friends you send to me. And for one and all, Lord, I pray constantly for safety, health, healing, happiness, success, satisfaction, fulfillment and the realization of their dreams and desires in accordance with your holy will. Lord, you are everywhere. You live in each person. Help them remember you are with them, and keep them happy.”
“A Prayer to Keep God First this New Year
Dear God,
Thank you that you make all things new.
Thank you for all that you’ve allowed into our lives this past year,
the good along with the hard things,
which have reminded us how much we need you.
We pray for your Spirit to lead us each step of this New Year.
We ask that you will guide our decisions
and turn our hearts to deeply desire you above all else.
We ask for your wisdom, for your strength and power
to be constantly present within us.
We pray you would make us strong
and courageous for the road ahead.
Give us ability beyond what we feel able,
let your gifts flow freely through us,
so that you would be honored by our lives,
and others would be drawn to you.
We pray for your protection over our families and friends.
We ask for your hand to cover us
and keep us distanced from the evil intent of the enemy;
that you would be a barrier to surround us,
that we’d be safe in your hands.
Forgive us for the times we have worked so hard to be self-sufficient,
forgetting our need for you, living independent of your spirit.
Keep your words of truth planted firm within us,
help us to keep focused on what is pure and right,
give us the power to be obedient to your word.
Lord, lead us on your level ground.
We ask that you would provide for our needs,
we pray that you would help us to prosper
and make every plan that you have birthed in our heart to succeed.
We pray that others would take notice of your goodness
and could not help but to say,
“These are the ones that the Lord has blessed.”
May we be lovers of truth,
may the fruits of your spirit be evident in our lives.
Shine your light in us, through us, over us.
May we make a difference in this world,
for your glory and purposes.
To you be glory and honor, in this New Year, and forever.
In Jesus’ name. Amen.”
So it’s been a full year. No world travels. No new ministry accomplishments, except a church renewal project I’m working on. No new awards or national honors, except a nice feature in Team magazine. Just a constant effort to do what the Lord asks for, “Pray always.”
Links:
LGBT Religious Archive profile — http://www.lgbtran.org/Profile.aspx?ID=247
Team magazine feature — http://teammag.ph/this-man-of-god-started-the-1st-openly-lgbtq-organization-in-the-philippines/
Brian McNaught’s website — http://www.brian-McNaught.com
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